When it comes to making decisions, there’s always a part of us that’s out of control.
It can be dictated by our emotions, by our current state or mood, and by the way our subconscious works.
How can we influence that part in our prospects?
I’m not talking about making them do stuff against their will…
But more about helping them make a decision we know they might benefit from.
Because often the deepest barriers for people, and the hardest to eradicate, are 1) they’re not believing that a solution will work, and 2) they’re not believing they have what it takes to make it work.
I have a theory…
Psychology says that higher self-control leads to increased self-esteem. When we realize we’re in control of our own decisions, we feel proud. Which generates a virtuous cycle.
With higher self-esteem, we also take more of our ego out of the equation. Which in turn helps us connect with other humans.
In short, self-control leads to human connection.
Want to convince people to buy from you? They have to reach the point where they feel some kind of connection or alignment. Both with your brand and with themselves.
But self-control is the pre-requisite.
I was thinking of what the core elements are that make us doubt and fail at self-control, until I watched the Netflix documentary “Stutz” where the psychotherapist Phil Stutz goes over his process for helping patients (check his book “Tools” out too, it’s good).
One of his main realizations is that each of us is hindered by 3 core factors:
“Pain, uncertainty, and constant work. No matter how successful you become, no one is ever free from them. No one.”
So I connected the dots…
Pain.
Uncertainty.
Constant work.
Our lack of or fear of losing control is constantly influenced by one of these (or a combination).
We experience or expect pain, which makes us doubt we’ll have what it takes or we simply give up.
We’re not sure if we can meet a challenge or we’re overwhelmed by chaos, so we crumble under the uncertainty.
We expect the work to be done so then and only then we’ll be happy… but inevitably, more work gets added to the pile.
And true self-control never feels attainable.
As a business owner or copywriter, if you want your prospects to believe in your solution and in themselves, you have to help them first feel like they’re in control.
It’s about addressing their (you guessed it) pains, their uncertainties and their anxieties around “work”, so they can take the reins of their decision.
You shouldn’t tell them, but rather show them.
They shouldn’t feel like you convinced them…
They should feel like they convinced themselves, and took ownership of their decision.
How can you alleviate their pains?
How can you shine a light on their uncertainties?
How can you turn “work” into “the required process to get the outcome”?
Inject your copy – especially towards the close – with these, and you’ll remove procrastination and indecision.
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It’s that time of the week, a new website teardown just went live on our YouTube channel. We’re looking at a very interesting SaaS Beta app with a simple landing page. How can you make it credible, clear and authoritative enough, when you likely don’t have social proof or a finished product yet?
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Quote and reflection of the day:
“The most intelligent men, like the strongest, find their happiness where others would find only disaster: in the labyrinth… their delight is in self-mastery… They regard a difficult task as a privilege; it is to them a recreation to play with burdens that would crush all others.”
– Friedrich Nietzsche, Antichrist
Being in a state of play doesn’t necessarily mean experiencing pleasure. But that we intentionally interpret every aspect of our current state as pleasure. We engage with every challenge as if it’s an opportunity to keep that state going. And to see where it leads us with openness, curiosity and eagerness.
